Yami Mirai
Doberman
dustn00b
Insane fangirl, at your service. :D
Posts: 120
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Post by Yami Mirai on Jan 18, 2006 16:17:22 GMT -4
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Post by SuperStantzio on Jan 18, 2006 16:21:36 GMT -4
It was very good. Keep the good work!
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Yami Mirai
Doberman
dustn00b
Insane fangirl, at your service. :D
Posts: 120
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Post by Yami Mirai on Jan 18, 2006 17:21:18 GMT -4
Thanks! I'll work on the second chapter after I finish the third chapter of my Crimson Tide fanfic.
(Of course, I still have an Inu Yasha fic that needs to be worked on and a website to finish... I have a really bad habit of jumping from idea to idea without waiting for them to be completed first. *Sigh*)
lol
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Post by Fritz on Jan 18, 2006 17:31:42 GMT -4
Very interesting start. I mean, yeah, some might find the "meet cute" a little cliche.
I had an idea for a gag you can use when they go on their first date if you like--I'm sending it on a PM to not spoil the surprise for everyone else.
I completely relate to that. I've spent some time the last couple weeks doing some updates to my Digimon site, and may even put out a new chapter of Digimon Quest (The fan fic nobody reads) and working some on Digibusters.
Ah well...
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Yami Mirai
Doberman
dustn00b
Insane fangirl, at your service. :D
Posts: 120
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Post by Yami Mirai on Jan 18, 2006 17:53:35 GMT -4
Very interesting start. I mean, yeah, some might find the "meet cute" a little cliche. I had an idea for a gag you can use when they go on their first date if you like--I'm sending it on a PM to not spoil the surprise for everyone else. Brilliant! I love it! ;D And I can totally see where he's coming from with that question too. It will have to be modified a bit to fit with Samantha's character, but I'll definitely work it into the fic and give you credit for it. Thanks!
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Post by ghostdiva on Jan 18, 2006 20:02:59 GMT -4
This is a good start. thoughi'mnotsosureiwantlouistobehappy. But you may change my mind on that, I don't usually comment before a story is done, but I did anyway. You've seem to hav ea good idea for what kind of woman can really be happy with a guy like Louis. I can't wait to see more. And I still haven't gotten around to your first story, but I will ghostdiva
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Yami Mirai
Doberman
dustn00b
Insane fangirl, at your service. :D
Posts: 120
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Post by Yami Mirai on Jan 18, 2006 20:34:57 GMT -4
This is a good start. thoughi'mnotsosureiwantlouistobehappy. lol, thanks. I just figured that two nerds would be attractive to each other. And even though you're not too keen on the idea of Louis finally finding happiness, I'm glad you're enjoying the story. Take your time. It's not even finished yet.
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Post by EGBFan on Jan 19, 2006 12:50:02 GMT -4
Ah, at last, Louis finds some happiness. I assume. It would just be cruel to twist this round and break Louis's heart. I know how some authors like to lead us astray, and the discussions we've been having here would be excellent cover for such a plot twist - but I think I'm safe rooting for a happy ending. Unfortunately MacBeth is one of those texts that were ruined for me by teachers. I had to study it when I was 12 - the age at which they give you really stupid tasks in response to literature, like, "Imagine you are Lady MacBeth and write a 600-word diary entry." Once you get to about 16 they credit you with some intelligence and you start studying plays properly, but anyway... I'm afraid I don't like Celeste much - at least not yet. Women who bug their friends and relatives to get involved with someone really get on my nerves. If it were me I would have told Celeste where to go, but I like to think I'm rather more outspoken than Samantha. I have yet to meet anyone whose @$$ I can't kick at Boggle. Still, I like to think I'm not yet in Louis's league when it comes to board game geekiness - I don't organise Boggle parties with guest lists and special trips out to buy snacks. I once had some friends round on my birthday and we ended up playing Scrabble (I prefer it to Boggle), but it wasn't planned. It was, you know, impulse Scrabble. ;D Yami, I am beginning to wonder if you and I have got some kind of psychic connection. If it happens, it won't be for at least another ten years, but the weird thing is I always planned to call my daughter Samantha. Well, anyway, keep it coming.
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Yami Mirai
Doberman
dustn00b
Insane fangirl, at your service. :D
Posts: 120
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Post by Yami Mirai on Jan 19, 2006 13:41:46 GMT -4
Ah, at last, Louis finds some happiness. I assume. It would just be cruel to twist this round and break Louis's heart. I know how some authors like to lead us astray, and the discussions we've been having here would be excellent cover for such a plot twist - but I think I'm safe rooting for a happy ending. You'll just have to wait and see. Don't worry, Celeste was merely a plot device. I have no plans on using her again. Samantha is too shy to have ever tried to pursue a relationship with someone without outside influence. Celeste figured that Louis and Sam would be good for each other and so she gave her cousin that necessary push to do something about it. Now that she's served her purpose, however, she'll probably just fade into the background. Weird. Quick, can you guess which number I'm thinking of? Will do! *Salutes* lol
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Post by Silent Seraphim on Jan 20, 2006 19:49:51 GMT -4
Loving this story so far. It's really is quite sweet. Are we going to see any reactions from the guys, Janine and Dana to this romance?
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Yami Mirai
Doberman
dustn00b
Insane fangirl, at your service. :D
Posts: 120
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Post by Yami Mirai on Jan 20, 2006 23:06:41 GMT -4
Loving this story so far. It's really is quite sweet. Are we going to see any reactions from the guys, Janine and Dana to this romance? Thanks! ;D That would be pretty funny. I'll have to keep it in mind.
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Yami Mirai
Doberman
dustn00b
Insane fangirl, at your service. :D
Posts: 120
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Post by Yami Mirai on Jan 28, 2006 15:01:22 GMT -4
Here it is folks, chapter 2! www.fanfiction.net/s/2758648/2/The date finally happens, and we get to see if those two click or not. (And I think the answer to that is pretty obvious. )
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Post by EGBFan on Jan 31, 2006 11:33:54 GMT -4
Lol, well, I don't think Garrett would go for Samantha anyway. Hey, I spotted it. I was reading the secene, and I thought, Ah-HA! Fritz suggested this one. Sharp as a lemon cheesecake, I am. Yeah, anyway, I like this chapter - it's great the way you get across Louis's perspective on a situation people have come to hate him for (poor guy), and the sadness he's experienced in the past. Not that other writers don't do that - Fritz, for example, has managed to bring himself to portray Louis with some sympathy - but without the Egon/Janine situation dominating procedings and no it should never have happened undertones (at least that I could see), I think it was really strong. The line about Louis being glad that Janine and Dana have both found happiness was a nice touch. Well, Louis turned up early, so he passes my first test (my day is ruined if I'm going out with someone and he or she turns up late). Pulling out chairs and stuff like that kinda bugs me, but as I said last time, I'm nothing like Samantha - she knows how to behave. You've done some great development on both her and Louis. If I were writing this, I don't really know what else I could do - I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with.
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Yami Mirai
Doberman
dustn00b
Insane fangirl, at your service. :D
Posts: 120
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Post by Yami Mirai on Jan 31, 2006 12:30:11 GMT -4
Lol, well, I don't think Garrett would go for Samantha anyway. Hey, I spotted it. I was reading the secene, and I thought, Ah-HA! Fritz suggested this one. Sharp as a lemon cheesecake, I am. Yes you are. When Fritz suggested that scene I just couldn't pass it up. It was really funny and an appropriate worry for him given his history. I'm glad Fritz did suggest it. I know I never would've thought of it myself. Thanks. ;D He's not a jerk, so of course he would wish them well, even if that means not being with him. I tried to keep any of those undertones out of the chapter, and I'm glad to see that it worked. This fanfic is about Louis and a new chance at happiness, not Louis and his failures. He's had a rough go at it, and now it's time for him to find love without his past playing too heavily into it. I'm glad you enjoyed this. ;D Yup, Louis turned up early to make a good impression; he didn't want to annoy Samantha by keeping her waiting. The old-fashioned stuff (the holding a door open for a lady and holding out her chair) bugs me too, but Louis was trying to be a gentleman for Samantha and she's a little old-fashioned about stuff like that, so it works for them.
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Post by Fritz on Jan 31, 2006 20:02:43 GMT -4
I liked the way that one went. There's a part of me that says "Is it really going to be that easy?" but the other voice in my head replies "C'mon, like the Venkmans and the Spenglers he'd endured so much trauma and drama that he's earned 'easy' "
If the self that I was two years ago saw some of the stories I've done lately, I might have even surprised him with the sympathetic portrayals I've managed of Louis Tully. I guess because, deep down, once I move past the "The little twerp got into the middle of something he shouldn't have been allowed to get into the middle of" idea, he's actually a pretty sympathetic character. I think just about everyone can identify with the pain of realizing the one you care for loves someone else.
I pretty much suggested Garrett for the joke at random; anyone else could've worked. Heck, since Rosey got Garrett married last year, the only one really still single is Roland (lol)
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